this.

i remember…

I remember silhouettes of strangers but they called themselves Mom and Dad and I remember planes and trains and trucks and buses that took us away from both and I remember tumbling cars and the piercing screams that sheltered them from the storm

I remember broken robot arms and Legos to take up the time and I remember planning on forgetting it all

But I also remember summer nights sprawled on Brainard Road and I remember leaving notes on the sophomore boy’s cars and feeling like we had finally found “our guys”

I remember Junior year basketball games when the spirits brought everyone together forever it seemed

And I remember Sterncrest and looking for the tackiest Christmas lights in town

And I remember sitting in the backseat with tears dwelling in my eyes at the thought of growing out of this

I remember thinking that the tears would never dry.

I remember hating Leo for going to college and letting me face high school alone and I remember him worrying about me always and

I remember telling him that I didn’t need him to protect me anymore. I remember lying about that.

I remember the first time I talked to Jane on the phone and feeling like I wouldn’t rather be doing anything else in the world

I remember when studying for a test always gave you an A and I remember when I realized it wouldn’t always be so easy and

I remember when I wrote notes to remind myself how happy I was.

I remember waters over days and days and took my breath away